Monday, October 22, 2012

Finding Aunt Ruby

She wasn't ever lost, just to some of her extended family.

Ruby May Norquist is my aunt by marriage.  She was married to my  Uncle Chet, who was my father Henry's closest brother.

The Norquist clan was a rather wild bunch back in the day.  Grandpa Olaf immigrated to this country from Sweden as an infant in 1879.  Grandma Emma was of Norwegian descent.  Grandma was a wonderful woman, a real survivor.  She bore 13 children, raised eight of them to adulthood, lived to be 99, and survived Grandpa, who was a crotchety old Swede nobody really liked, including Grandma.

Aunt Ruby married my Uncle Chet after a failed first marriage.  She brought two children with her to that marriage.  Because they did not live nearby, I didn't know Ruby's children.  She and Uncle Chet didn't have any of their own.

I remember Ruby as being sort of quietly on the outside during big family gatherings.  She was a very devout Christian even back then.     She and my mother seemed to form a fairly close relationship, and Dad and Chet were very close.

Uncle Chet died under very tragic circumstances in 1990.  I think his funeral might be the last time I saw Aunt Ruby.  My dad died in 1996.  Mom and Ruby must have corresponded for a while after that.

In her last years of life, my mother wondered what had happened to Ruby.  Ruby was older, and often seemed in poor health, and Mom wondered if she was still living.  Mom thought she, herself,  might be the last of that Norquist generation.  

Mom died close to a year ago now, not knowing.

Then last week, I got an e-mail from my brother.  He had received an invitation addressed to our mother, Violet Norquist, and forwarded to him.  It was for Ruby May Norquist's 100th birthday!

At last, we found Aunt Ruby!  

On Sunday Tom and I went to the Lighthouse Christian Center in Puyallup, WA.  It is a big modern church complex, with lots of community action.  It appeared that the whole congregation had stayed after services to honor Ruby, who we discovered to be a true pillar of the church.

I did get a few minutes during a break in the program to talk to my aunt.  She was very pleased to see me, after I introduced myself.  I had RSVP'ed to the invitation and let the organizer know that Mom had passed away.  That news was shared with my aunt ahead of time.
 What a remarkable woman she is.  She can see and hear and think clearly and walk!  I confessed to her that we didn't think she was even still alive!  Here you see me reacting as she tells me that ten years ago she was in hospice care and not expected to live.  And the two years ago, the same thing.  I think she would tell you she prayed her death away.  She said she had quite the stories to tell.
 The program was continuing, so I didn't have long.  She said we could talk later, but that didn't happen.
 During the buffet lunch we found some of her family.  They were children and grandchildren of her two children, who were not Norquists.  We met the young woman who calls her Grandma, with whom Aunt Ruby lives.  
 Here at the table are some of those folks, related to her daughter Arlene.
Ruby blew out her candles and cut her cake.  Then there was an open mike.  I took the opportunity to share who I was and how happy we were to have found Aunt Ruby.  

We didn't get another chance to talk, and the program went on and we had to leave for another engagement.

I have Aunt Ruby's address and will send her a letter and maybe a few photos.  She wants to know about my mother, and I will be happy to share her story.  

And Mom, we found Aunt Ruby!

18 comments:

  1. What a wonderful story. Your Aunt Ruby has spunk. I had an Aunt Ruby, too. She was my mother's sister, and I loved and admired her. She died three years ago.

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  2. That's a great story Linda. Very heart-warming.

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  3. A wonderful experience. Tell Jill she needs to look at that cake, the ribbon is quite lovely. Thanks for sharing this event with us. If I could look that good at 100 I just might consider shooting for 100.

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  4. What a beautiful story, Linda. I wish your mom could have seen her, but at least you were able to "find" her. What a fabulous celebration. Too too wonderful!

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  5. She is a fine specimen of a centenarian! Wow, I would never have guessed that she is that old. And still has all of her faculties. Happy birthday, Ruby! :-)

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  6. That was a special find and so great that you were able to attend.

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  7. She looks incredibly hale and hearty at the age of 100. Are you able to speak to her on the phone? That might be better than writing a letter to her about your mother. BTW, I love that birthday cake. How clever!

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  8. That's wonderful! I'm so very happy that you 'found' your aunt -- such a wonderful treasure for you -- another connection to your mom.

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  9. Thanks, I needed that! What a wonderful story. God bless you all!

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  10. Great story! One of the things I have discovered now that I have enough time to pay attention, is that everyone has a story! So glad you found your aunt, that she is still alive and looking so good!

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  11. It's a nice feeling to reconnect or even discover some family ties. I was playing cards in August with a 100 year partner of my 91 year old aunt when a her uncle appeared. Loved to meet him for the second time. I met him last year. Never knew he of him. My mom forgot to mention her dad's brother had two kids. I now have met both. My mom died in '88. her sister introduced us. She stayed in touch.

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  12. What a thrill for you. A shame that your mum passed away before she could remake the friendship after all those years. !00 years! What a great lady? - Dave

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  13. Good for her. What an inspiration she is. The extended family reunions are always interesting.

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  14. That is so neat! I am so happy that you guys were able to go to her 100th birthday celebration. This is a very heartwarming post, Linda.

    Yay!

    Kathy M.

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